Birthday
"Support lang naman kailangan ko sayo eh, ang badtrip na nga nang araw ko ang negavibes mo pa!" - then she starts sobbing.
This is the replay mental image of my girlfriend running in my head while I try to ease her long day when her buyer/client pulls an annoying "I forgot the checks again" drama. Among other work related stresses which I have been a daily sounding board for.
Point blank. Why do I put up with this? More importantly, I've been made to feel that despite me genuinely trying to help out, I'm the insensitive guy for keeping quiet, not showing my annoyance to her client. I should have been the more supportive "it's okay, at least you've gotten the checks..." Type of boyfriend she says. PS: before she stormed out of the car to meet her client, I wasn't even sure if he had the checks on hand or whatnot. In retrospect, I wasn't even 15 minute mongering whether he'd be there on time in which he was late still, but not by too much.
It was her birthday that day. Who idiot boyfriend would want to be the guy who breaks his girlfriend's heart on her special day? Apparently I'm very skilled at that. What a disappointment.
I didn't lose my temper, thank Christ. Almost did though. I did however, become detached to her the next day, which was hours ago. My brain's rationale was if I'm adding stress to her already stressed out setup, best not be part of it. Every so often she would say her goodmorning, eat lunch na etc... My reply is a dry okay, you also, take care on your way home. Rest well. Goodnight.
My general disposition now is leaning towards, fuck it. "Di pala ako okay eh, eh di wag ko na effortan." As I type these words I feel my anger tip slightly, then crisis control kicks in and a sweeping wave of apathy imposes itself.
Deep breath out. I don't want to label. The complaining girlfriend. I've been there I've encountered their archetype and loathe them. I break my girlfriend's will and pride and I'm no better than the fucktard assholes these women date or marry.
A long cigarette drag. Contemplating a glass of scotch to lull myself to sleep. This isn't the first time I've been in this. Two words repeat in my head: why bother.
This is the replay mental image of my girlfriend running in my head while I try to ease her long day when her buyer/client pulls an annoying "I forgot the checks again" drama. Among other work related stresses which I have been a daily sounding board for.
Point blank. Why do I put up with this? More importantly, I've been made to feel that despite me genuinely trying to help out, I'm the insensitive guy for keeping quiet, not showing my annoyance to her client. I should have been the more supportive "it's okay, at least you've gotten the checks..." Type of boyfriend she says. PS: before she stormed out of the car to meet her client, I wasn't even sure if he had the checks on hand or whatnot. In retrospect, I wasn't even 15 minute mongering whether he'd be there on time in which he was late still, but not by too much.
It was her birthday that day. Who idiot boyfriend would want to be the guy who breaks his girlfriend's heart on her special day? Apparently I'm very skilled at that. What a disappointment.
I didn't lose my temper, thank Christ. Almost did though. I did however, become detached to her the next day, which was hours ago. My brain's rationale was if I'm adding stress to her already stressed out setup, best not be part of it. Every so often she would say her goodmorning, eat lunch na etc... My reply is a dry okay, you also, take care on your way home. Rest well. Goodnight.
My general disposition now is leaning towards, fuck it. "Di pala ako okay eh, eh di wag ko na effortan." As I type these words I feel my anger tip slightly, then crisis control kicks in and a sweeping wave of apathy imposes itself.
Deep breath out. I don't want to label. The complaining girlfriend. I've been there I've encountered their archetype and loathe them. I break my girlfriend's will and pride and I'm no better than the fucktard assholes these women date or marry.
A long cigarette drag. Contemplating a glass of scotch to lull myself to sleep. This isn't the first time I've been in this. Two words repeat in my head: why bother.
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