potatochief

The feels are tremendous today. Came home on the wrong side of 12pm and I'm not happy. I'm actually pissed. I don't have a single cent in my wallet when I got home and I didn't even get laid last night. Granted, I slept naked beside a naked woman, but despite that I'd have rather painted a goddamn scale model last night. Even if I did score last night, I'll probably bitch as much as I am now. Things are changing and has changed dramatically this year. My tolerance for the uncalled for and the useless (to my liking) has been taken to the chopping board of things to change for the better. Although the past few days included partying and drinking till 4am, none of these experiences registered as "I miss this " and has instead landed at the doorstep of "fvckn hate getting into these situations". It fuels the embers of frustration deep within me. I know that I suffer now in order to permanently correct the things that have been inherently wron...

So ive downloaded this new app called Tinder and frankly, its freaking me out. I dont know how I should react to this dating app but what i'm sure of is that it makes me nervous just to say hi on the message board. Its not like the girls that swiped right are the exactly the girls I like, I just found them cuter than the hordes of other girls i've swiped left... Some things never change for me. I truly still am a torpe kind of guy. I really don't know what to say and i'd rather think or write about this moment than to actually just simply say hi. I also don't know where i want this to lead to. Sure, it might be interesting for me to meet new people this way but the newness of this method kinda overwhelms me still. Should I wait for them to message me instead as my friend recommends? Should I wait awhile before I message away? Should I practice saying hi to girls I don't mind not getting to know so I have a bit of small talk experience when I chance on...

It’s the things we do not see that truly begs the question. What makes a person tick, for example. I for one have always been fascinated by this. It may be because as a former actor, my old job required me to understand and identify emotion to bring forth to an audience. This curiosity made me always want to decipher peoples' minds ever further and deeper. For example, how does a painter or a sketch artist arrive at the composition of his or her artwork? What were the parameters in choosing the design and concept of the work in the first place? Is the work based on a personal experience? Is it an image in their minds eye that they wish to bring forth via pencil and paper? Why that particular scene? I grew up surrounded by creatives and have been blessed to call one of the country's premier artists of all time as grandfather. Furthermore, my uncles, aunt, cousins and siblings express art in their own unique ways. I do, to a certain degree, possess the same innate skill o...

I miss my simple, silly old life. I need a reboot. I've been chasing after goals and expectations that's wearing me down right about now. Not that these changes are bad per se, its just that I barely remember why i'm going through this transformation in the first place. It started with a girl, as with most overhauls. Pero ang tagal narin nun. I've moved on for sure. I don't want a rerun of that experience hence the upgrades and the whatnot's. So what has changed since then? Now i'm fully committed financially to rebuilding an iconic japanese vintage sports car. I've finally cracked the dry spell of non-tvc-ing. Thanks also in part to new friends. It did help that i maintain a certain weight that registers better through the lens. In losing weight, visually and physically I've never felt this confident in a very long time. Aside from the self imposed pressure im experiencing now, i'd say its positive growth for me. I'm starting to fit the...

And we cross paths again. Not entirely by accident, but not without the element of chance. I had hoped to see you. I hoped that you'd be where I knew you might go to... As you weave through the crowd upon your arrival, on hopes confirmed: cheesy as hell, my heart was a-flutter! I discreetly tell my friends that you've come. Predictably, I was panicked. All I could that time was measly "Hi". I hurriedly kissed your cheek. Cheek on cheek only. It happened so fast. Half a second later, I waved you the "see you around and about" salute. After that, like a ninja, I vanished! I blurred and blended with the visual noise of people and installations of that evening's occasion. I glance at my friend, she wore an amused but with a virtual facepalm expression on her face. I wasn't sure if she saw how pathetic my opening move was! I was cringing at my wimpyness! My other friends gave me this disapproving glare that says: you and I don't fit. Aka - I...

This tiny little infant in a blue and white polkadot dress was so cute and adorable. As me and my buddy wait for the sunlounger chairs to be vacated by the poolside, we were left with no other choice but to sit so close to this baby in all its cuteness. And thats how it started. Soon i was gazing into the 5 month old-ish toddler's eyes. She then started smiling and twisting her wrist as if she wanted a swig of beer. I had a can of red horse in hand. I mumbled these words to her: "nope, you're too young for this". She was engaging me with her baby laugh and pointed at my drink. She repeated her i-want-a-swig wrist gesture. This kid! I then tell my friend, "yo check out the baby..." You know what, this darling little toddler was on to something! She gestured to my friend this time that she wanted to smoke what we smoked! My crazy friend gives the sign of approval. I tell baby "nope, dont listen to your uncle, youre too young for that...". And...

My writing in review I went through the entries I've written since the inception of my personal blog and I'm stunned by the volume of words i've pumped out since late December last year. (I have yet to master Nazi-ing with grammatical, composition and spelling errors... I do have the tendency to post then edit post-post) Funny how events in your life can jolt you out of a comfort zone. Usually, the entries I make are strictly confidential. As it turns out, my gloriosity hungers for an audience other than myself. Embarrasing for me but true. It couldn't be that this writing spree happened overnight too. In keeping with the theories found in the book - The tipping point - a series of seemingly insignificant, but related events have led to this moment - that you are reading something that is (now was) intended only for me. Since my first EPIC global entry - douchie- i've noticed that my speed in writing has increased significantly. The douchebag entry took over...